Dear Sylvia,
You should not move out from your home. You have friends and family that care about you very much, including myself. The world would be a confusing place to be in without proper guidance. You also have many more opportunities here at home with us.
First, many people know you, and you’re a kind person to everyone here in town. To me your one of my best friends, we have known eachother since pre-school. I couldn’t even think about not being able to see you again.
Secondly, the world is a confusing place Sylvia, and I wouldn’t want to see you go through it alone. It might look simple, but it’s really complicated. If you think you can tackle it on your own without the proper guidance, things can turn ugly.
Thirdly, things here at home are not so bad. Your friends and family love you and couldn’t bare to see you leave. You may have to share a room with your sister, and follow certain household rules, and make things work with a college boyfriend, but please try and make the best of what you have now.
I hope you can make the right decision for yourself. Your friends cant bare to see you leave our lives. The world is a very strange place for a young woman to endure. Also, things here at home can be much better than they may seem. Please make the right decision.
~ A Friend
You should not move out from your home. You have friends and family that care about you very much, including myself. The world would be a confusing place to be in without proper guidance. You also have many more opportunities here at home with us.
First, many people know you, and you’re a kind person to everyone here in town. To me your one of my best friends, we have known eachother since pre-school. I couldn’t even think about not being able to see you again.
Secondly, the world is a confusing place Sylvia, and I wouldn’t want to see you go through it alone. It might look simple, but it’s really complicated. If you think you can tackle it on your own without the proper guidance, things can turn ugly.
Thirdly, things here at home are not so bad. Your friends and family love you and couldn’t bare to see you leave. You may have to share a room with your sister, and follow certain household rules, and make things work with a college boyfriend, but please try and make the best of what you have now.
I hope you can make the right decision for yourself. Your friends cant bare to see you leave our lives. The world is a very strange place for a young woman to endure. Also, things here at home can be much better than they may seem. Please make the right decision.
~ A Friend
This is really good. I would give it a rating of a 3 because you made good points and you stuck to the points you made in the body paragraphs. I think that you could make a thesis out of the three main points you made and construct a conclusion with it too. Great essay!
ReplyDeleteI agree that this paper is a 3. The supporting details could have had more reasons. The conclusion sums up the body paragraphs and the author's position is made clear throughout the paper.
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